Although we would consider it part and parcel of a five star gold establishment we have decided to mention the following under the heading of ‘bullshit’ as so many other b&bs do so as part of their description.
Yes, we do have monogrammed bath robes which are supposed to entice you to relax! Free tea and gorgeous homemade cake on arrival, wonderful AGA cooked breakfasts with homemade bread and, would you believe, at a time of your choosing! Fresh flowers as opposed to dead ones in the rooms. Not saplings but mature trees in the garden.
It is very nice to stay in a good quality B&B; lovely room, fresh flowers, etc but what about the food that’s on that pretty plate? One B&B said you could tell their eggs were free range because their yolks were bright yellow, rich in natural goodness. Rich alright, rich in an artificial colouring agent in their feed! How about breakfast cereals? They look really nice in those jars; after all, cornflakes are cornflakes are cornflakes. Er no!
What about photos? A nightdress with a nipped in waist on a bed; or maybe a large flowerpot! With us you don’t get flowery language or contrived photographs because it’s all just Bullshit!